custodial father passed away..stepmother seeking gaurdianship...mother unfit...please help

[g***@yahoo.com]

I really don't know if anyone out there can help me, but I'm willing
to give it a shot, and at least I feel like I'm doing something right
now, and not completely helpless.
Let me begin with a little history. 3yrs ago the girls mother went
missing...interestingly enough it was on the day she was due in court
for a sentencing hearing on her 2nd drunk driving conviction. We had
no clue about any of this. As events unfolded it became clear that
the mother had so brainwashed the girls that they didn't talk about
anything bad going on at home. The drunk driving, suicide attempts,
domestic abuse, etc...we never did find out all of it..we let
counselors help, and chose not to push for information. My husband
immediately filed for physical custody, and it was awarded to him
finally, after a lot of really bad things said and done by the
mother...which would take a novel to tell you about. Now to the
future...the girls are thriving, happy, and well adjusted. The oldest
will be 17 at the end of the month and will be a senior this year, the
youngest, 16 in september, and a junior. Sadly their father passed
away suddenly on July5th. They were devestated but adament about
staying with me. I tried to do everything right, even telling them
that if they needed to be with their mother I would understand, and
always love them..we spent many hours talking about it, and still
their decision never waivered. I went to the same lawyer that handled
the custody case, and the girls were able to sign guardianship request
forms, that were filed with the court on the 16th. In the interim
their mother called them, and started saying really bad things about
their father...like he was the one who woldn't let her see them...she
hadn't excersied her visitation rights in 2 yrs, and rarely called.
They knew this was a lie. she told them that she was going to show up
with the police, and drag them away from here the same way their
father dragged them away from her. Well tonight July 18th, at 9:15
she did just that, the police threatened to arrest the girls if they
didn't go, can you believe that. She got a court order w/out anyone
having to be notified. I will call the lawyers in the morning...but
in the meantime..any help out there???

[Robert]

My first thought when reading this was there any life insurance on their
father and were the children named on the policy?

I have seen this happen for financial gain when someone just all of a sudden
just POPS up like that!! I would do my hardest to make sure that if that is
the case that because of the circumstances that if money is to go to the
children that it goes into a trust fund so that it actually goes to the
children!

My wife is not the mother of my children (she is the step mom) and my
biggest fears was that my exwife would show up and try to drag the kids off.
My ex-wife has not been in any sort of substantial contact with the children
over the last 5 yrs, she shows up for a few hours every 5 to 6 months and
doesnt call at anytime other then when she decides she will see the
children.

So I took out a 500k life insurance policy so that my wife could have the
means to fight my ex should that ever come up. (my wife being the primary
benificiary and my now 18 yo daughter 2nd on the policy)

But even if there is no life insurance Social Security will pay benifits to
the children till they are 18 and that could be enough to get someone to act
in the same way.

I would question her motive after all this time that is for sure.

Now the age of the children has a lot to do with what you can do and how
long they have been in your home. Older children that have been in your
care for several years have a better chance of being released back to you
under "equitable parent" rules

read this (it applies in MOST states if not all)

EQUITABLE PARENT

In Michigan (Atkinson v. Atkinson, 408 N.W.2d 516 (1987)) and Wisconsin
(In re Paternity of D.L.H., 419 N.W.2d 283 (1987)), a spouse who is not
a legal parent (biological or adoptive) may be granted custody or
visitation under the notion of equitable parent. Courts apply it when a
spouse and child have a close relationship and consider themselves
parent and child, or when the legal parent encouraged this relationship.
If the court grants an equitable parent custody or visitation, then the
parent will also be required to pay child support.

Equitable parenthood arose to protect husbands who discover, in the
course of a divorce, that they are not the biological fathers. It could
also protect a stepparent who is divorcing a biological parent when the
other biological parent is either deceased or absent.

http://www.lectlaw.com/files/fam16.htm

Post by g***@yahoo.com
I really don't know if anyone out there can help me, but I'm willing
to give it a shot, and at least I feel like I'm doing something right
now, and not completely helpless.
Let me begin with a little history. 3yrs ago the girls mother went
missing...interestingly enough it was on the day she was due in court
for a sentencing hearing on her 2nd drunk driving conviction. We had
no clue about any of this. As events unfolded it became clear that
the mother had so brainwashed the girls that they didn't talk about
anything bad going on at home. The drunk driving, suicide attempts,
domestic abuse, etc...we never did find out all of it..we let
counselors help, and chose not to push for information. My husband
immediately filed for physical custody, and it was awarded to him
finally, after a lot of really bad things said and done by the
mother...which would take a novel to tell you about. Now to the
future...the girls are thriving, happy, and well adjusted. The oldest
will be 17 at the end of the month and will be a senior this year, the
youngest, 16 in september, and a junior. Sadly their father passed
away suddenly on July5th. They were devestated but adament about
staying with me. I tried to do everything right, even telling them
that if they needed to be with their mother I would understand, and
always love them..we spent many hours talking about it, and still
their decision never waivered. I went to the same lawyer that handled
the custody case, and the girls were able to sign guardianship request
forms, that were filed with the court on the 16th. In the interim
their mother called them, and started saying really bad things about
their father...like he was the one who woldn't let her see them...she
hadn't excersied her visitation rights in 2 yrs, and rarely called.
They knew this was a lie. she told them that she was going to show up
with the police, and drag them away from here the same way their
father dragged them away from her. Well tonight July 18th, at 9:15
she did just that, the police threatened to arrest the girls if they
didn't go, can you believe that. She got a court order w/out anyone
having to be notified. I will call the lawyers in the morning...but
in the meantime..any help out there???